Clean

I just started reading "Clean" by Alejandro Junger a cardiologist in NYC. I found the book via GOOP.com and have found it very interesting. The author speaks my language, the medical language. Much of the book is based on his own quest for a healthy lifestyle. Feeling healthy, clear minded, with energy and a zest for living. He weaves in yoga, meditation and trusting the body to heal itself.

Trusting my body - this is my work right now. I live mostly in my head. Working on being present in my body is a challenge as I do not LIKE my body very much right now the way it is. I am trying to treat it better with more exercise and meditation. And food. My nemesis. I hate thinking about food, preparing food, grocery shopping, talking about food. I just love eating food. All food. But I now have made the connection - if I spend so much time in my head, the food I crave and want and love is about my MIND not my BODY. This is much of the work that I have been doing with Geneen Roth, author of Women Food and God. I struggle with where to begin - how do I access the part of my body that has this knowledge? To eat for energy and clarity and life. I do not think I have ever done that in my 39 years on the planet.

So here I am. Pressing the reset button. Going back to the beginning. My mind is not going to like it. Not sure what my body will do. Here is my plan.

Today I started an elimination diet. What that means is lots of "no's". No caffeine (a big ugh right there), no white stuff, no dairy, no eggs, no wheat, no corn (and by products), no red meat, no chocolate, no alcohol. Sounds fun? Not really. But it is not forever. Walking around Whole Foods today (actually grocery shopping!!) I was overwhelmed with the amount of food there is that may be included. Quinoa, amaranth, brown rice products, nut products (not peanuts), beans and legumes. After a week of this elimination diet I may decide to do a cleanse suggested in the book. That would be from one to three weeks and consists of two liquid meals a day (smoothies, veggie juice, soups) and one regular meal a day.

I want to be clear here.... I am not embarking on this to lose weight. If it is a side effect, so be it. I am truly interested in paying attention to what my body needs. What my body craves. I believe I cannot do this without removing the junk in my diet for a bit - and then re introducing some foods. It will be interesting for me to sit with being uncomfortable. Remembering what it is like to be hungry. To listen to what my cravings for sugar and sweets and fat is really about.

Should be an interesting journey.

Resolutions for a New Decade

Yes, a new decade....I am not big on New Year's Resolutions, but I do enjoy reflecting and planning.

Let's review my past decade - not in any particular order....Had a baby, changed jobs (twice), had another baby, visited Scotland, went to Vieques Puerto Rico twice, met some new friends, lost touch with some old friends, got back in touch with some old friends (aka the magic of facebook), got a kitten, got a puppy, started a blog, became curious with my relationship with food, ran 9 5K road races, ran one 5 mile road race, had shoulder surgery and the following 9+months of rehab, went to Disneyworld, presented at 3 national conferences, wrote a chapter in a textbook, had major construction on my house and therefore lived for 9 weeks with my mother in law, and did MANY MANY loads of laundry.

Seems like alot for 10 years. I may have forgotten a few things, but I think that about sums it up.

I have been putting alot of thought into what I want for my life. Tonight, on our 12th wedding anniversary my husband and I just had the luxury of sitting in front of the fire with a bottle of Prosecco discussing what we wanted for our marriage in the next 10 years. More time together. Connecting - just us - at least weekly. Planning a getaway for a few days every year so that we can enjoy each other's company and remember what it is like to be in love. Yes, he did recommend more sex as well.....I agreed....

That lead into a discussion of goals for our family. Making Sundays family day. Church, then lunch and then a family outdoor activity. Teaching the kids to love cross country skiing, snowshoeing. Walks in the woods and at the beach with the dog. Family game time. Even Wii competitions.

For me--- I hunger for balance. Balance in my physical, social and spiritual life. Balance at work. Putting self care on the list. The TOP of the list. What does that look like for me? Regular exercise. Good food. No self judgement or self loathing. Acupuncture. Meditation. I even made an appointment with a Naturopath to fully look at my whole life and help with balance. Time to be still and sit with myself and my God. Sleep. Breathing. Laughter. Friends. Family.

And a few nice bottles of wine.

That, my friends, is my kind of resolution.