Wednesday, February 24, 2010

I need a wife

No really, I need a wife. Or maybe we (Jim and I et al) need a wife. You know, someone who does laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning and organizes and runs a household. I'm not too good at that....I'm a great nurse, pretty good mother and let's say good partner to my husband. Wife, not so much.

I may need to change the by line up there. Wife connotes so much more than I am able to do. I picture the 1950s woman with the pearls, kind of Leave It to Beaver era. I so admire the stay at home moms (I know one woman who calls it VP of Domestic Affairs - love it!). I have summers off and by the first week in August I'm ready to go back to work. Work is so much easier.

Women are stuck in this no man's land (no pun intended). Guilt over working full time and not being a part of the children's lives enough. The feeling missing out on life because work calls. Then home calls and I can't give enough to work because of sick child, volunteering in a classroom, driving to piano lessons. I remember when my friend who helped me with child care for a few years called me at work and said "Oh my God Allison, Erin is walking!" I burst into tears.

I know some stay at home moms that also feel guilty. Feeling like they can't spend any money on themselves because they are not bringing any in (I do always remind those friends of the $20K+ they are saving yearly on daycare). Women have expressed to me not feeling appreciated for all that they do - I could list here, but no need. I get it. I am just not sure there is a happy medium. Working moms feel guilty, SAHMs feel guilty. We need balance. And to give ourselves a break.

So that is why I need a wife. Heck, I'll even call he/she a domestic personal assistant. Chief Operating Officer of Chez Kilcoyne? Oh great one?

And no Jim, we will not recruit from the Swedish Olympic Ski team.

1 comment:

  1. What a coincidence! I was venting about this same topic to several people this week! There is no happy medium. Working moms feel guilty. Stay at home moms feel taken advantage of. There isn't enough time to do everything and please everyone, regardless of how much you try. Just do the best you can and take care of yourself! A happy wife/mom, is a good wife/mom! Cheers, the VP

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